Tuesday, February 26, 2008

“If elected President, my first order of business will be to do away with the prefix anti-. Because to me, in order to think positively, you have to surround yourself with the trappings of positivityness, in all of its forms. And to surround yourself with the trappings of positivityness — to immerse yourself in its warmth, to feel its reassurance along the finer hairs of your thighs, to really live it like a bomb, as my dear friends the Def Leppard might say — you have first to remove the tattered remains of negativityness that plague Hope’s interstate like so many moldering, bloodcaked possum carcasses.

“– And before anyone raises any objections, do know that ‘antiperspirant’ will of course be exempt from the prefix ban. I mean, I may be an idealist, but I ain’t some kind of crazy man.” — Barack Obama, address to the MLA convention, Chicago, Dec 28.


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